Dhamma for laypeople

Dhamma isn’t just about transcending the world. There are 2 parts to it. The part for staying with the world and for transcending the world. Most people here are laypeople, so we must learn the worldly part of dhamma. Then, we’ll be able to live in the world with appropriate happiness. People don’t have true happiness. Their happiness is always in the future, never in the present. Each person is being driven to constantly search for happiness. They think they will be happy once they reach a certain goal, and they struggle to achieve it. They keep searching for the future, but they forget the present.

People search for happiness in the future

but forget happiness in the present

The Buddha taught us to be happy in the present without neglecting the future. If our present is good, the future will be good. Most people run around searching for happiness like hungry dogs searching for small amounts of food. We must know what the goal of our life is. If we aim to live with the world, we can learn to live with it happily and with less suffering. There are many things to do and learn to live happily with the world. Once we have a goal, we see how to achieve that goal. On the other hand, we must not strive for the goal so much that we suffer in the present. A lot of people suffer this way, which is a pity.

Many people are ambitious. They want to be rich and powerful. Many people want to have big houses, and they work hard to get it. They take on a loan and live a frugal life, hoping they will one day live happily in their big house. By the time they finish loan repayment, their house is already falling apart. Everything we perceive as good in the worldly sense is all fleeting and impermanent. We willingly endure hardships for things that lack permanence. It’s just a temporary comfort, deceiving ourselves day by day. Many people want big houses and they endure hardships. They have to tighten their belts and struggle. But most people don’t even know what to do with their big house.

Many Thai people dream of building multiple houses, one for each child. But if they don’t have much money, they still build a big house with many rooms, one for each child. They dream and endure hardships, but in the end, they become old, lonely grandparents living alone. Society has completely changed. What they get is just emptiness. Some people want to be rich, and work hard to amass wealth. But as they get older, their health deteriorates from stress, and all their money goes to doctors.

How can we live a balanced life that is not overly burdensome in the present and still supports a good future? All of this requires insight, not just desires. No matter how many desires we fulfill, it’s never enough. We need to be rational and do our work, but not push ourselves too hard to the point of damaging our health. Do our best and be happy with the results we achieve. We should do our best but not push ourselves too hard; otherwise, we can’t find happiness in life.

This morning, people who had previously ordained with me came to see me. One person is a doctor, and he said his life is now stable. He doesn’t have to struggle anymore. But he’s considering studying further for opportunities to become a professor. He can’t decide. On one hand, he is self-fulfilled. On the other hand he doesn’t feel enough yet. So I told him to notice what is the driving force that drives him endlessly. He’s a meditator, so I told him to observe the driving factor behind his mind. Is it the desire for fame, honor, power, or other desires? If we’re aware of the desire, then we won’t follow it blindly, but we do what we reasonably need to do.

I told him not to use desire but good intention (Chanda) to consider whether to study further. If he has Chanda to become a proficient doctor to help other people, this is one thing. But if he wants to become famous so people recognize him, this is another. One is wholesome; another is unwholesome. Be aware of it and choose the correct path with wisdom. If he wants to be famous or rich, I tell him to listen to my experience. I studied political science at Chula University. Several of my friends wanted to attain high-ranking positions, such as governor or ambassador. They fought very hard throughout their lives and reached such positions since they were highly capable.

However, they could only live with it for 1-2 years before retirement. They have reached the ultimate goal of their lives but couldn’t hold on to it. Now they’re just retired officers, or speaking informally- just old uncles, old auties. They’ve worked so hard along the way. Each day was tiring and stressful with little happiness. It was also stressful to hold on to their positions. They just hoped to be happy in the future. However, after just 1-2 years, they had to retire, and then what was left? Only their memories remain. Is it worth it to get happiness by dwelling on the past? It may be good by worldly standards, but I did not choose this path because I could find something much more valuable.

I was fortunate to have been born in a family that had right view. They brought me to temples since I was less than one year old. I was born in December 1952, and during the Buddhist Lent in 1953, I was brought to the temple every day. I couldn’t understand the preaching, but I listened quietly and didn’t cry. My mind was familiar with it. I knew that there is another path. I meditated everday and I knew I could be happy with the present. I didn’t have to dream of happiness in the future. People search for happiness in the future but forget happiness in the present.

Different perspectives lead to different ways of living

I used to read a book, but I can’t remember who wrote it. It tells the story of a financial analyst who goes on vacation and sees a person fishing on the beach. The person is fishing as a hobby. He catches some fish, eats them, and just relaxes around the beach. The analyst feels pity for the guy who is wasting his life by sitting around and fishing. So, he advises the guy to hire a fishing boat to catch more fish and earn more money. Then, the analyst advises him to use that money to buy more fishing boats for an even bigger income.

The analyst tells him that if he has more money, he can relax when he gets older. The guy asked how? The analyst said that when he gets old, he could relax and sit around the beach worry-free with all that money. The guy then replies that he is already having a relaxing life. He doesn’t need to work hard his whole life to be relaxing and worry-free. See? Different perspectives lead to different ways of living. But I’m not saying which one is right or wrong. It depends on each person to decide.

Before my ordain, I used to meet a businessman in the field of telecommunication. I was working at the TOT with my director. This businessman frequently came to meet my director for business opportunities. One day, he told my director that he was quitting business to become a politician. My director was very clever, not technically, but he was clever at reading people. So my director could reach a high position and wasn’t involved in any lawsuit until his retirement. He warned the businessman not to become a politician, otherwise the businessman could be sentenced to jail.

But the businessman didn’t believe him, so he had to endure several years of hardship. Why is it so? It’s because the man only wished for more wealth. He had wealth and wanted to protect it, so he got into politics. After he got into politics, he couldn’t quit. And what did he get? Ordinary people don’t need to have billions of dollars to feed themselves 3 meals a day. Even though rich people have big houses, they can only stay in one room and sleep in one bed at a time. Does someone sleep in a bed as big as a football field? No, because our body is only this size. Several things we want and deem critical in our life turn out to be empty. We choose our own life. See what is right, what is suitable, what is beneficial for us.

For me, I worked hard and was almost debt-free. There was only 1 time that I took a loan to buy a house. At that time I wasn’t smart yet. I saw other people buy properties and collect treasures, so I did it. Finally, I didn’t get to live in the house, I came to ordain instead. Everyday after I woke up, I set my intention to uphold the 5 precepts. During the day, before I had my meal and before I slept, I would set my intention to uphold the 5 precepts. I kept reminding myself not to break the precepts and I meditated daily. I didn’t practice walking meditation much because my house was an old wooden house. When I walked, the wood squeaked. So, I mostly practiced sitting meditation, not walking meditation. Sometimes, I was swinging my arms and was aware of them.

I meditated daily. If my mind was restless, I would practice calm meditation. Otherwise, I would watch my mind. During the day, I mostly watched my mind. But during working time, I concentrated fully on my work. I worked as a government officer, and I reminded myself that I was hired to work, not to meditate. One person complained that their boss didn’t let them meditate and called them to work. I said that it’s correct. They hire people to work, not to meditate. So, during my working time, I work fully. My mindfulness, concentration and wisdom were fully invested in my work, not drifting elsewhere. So, concentrate fully when you work. But when it’s time for a break, come back to read your mind with mindfulness.

Practice like this, so both your worldly and dhamma duties can be fulfilled. While I was working as a government officer, I grew up in rank quickly. After I changed to work at a state-owned enterprise, I still grew up in rank quickly. I didn’t need any connection; it was due to my commitment to work. Meditators don’t ignore their duties and responsibilities. Some people drop their duties, intending to go meditate at the temple. But while they are at the temple, they worry that their work is not finished. So, they can’t focus on anything, and no task is successful.

We have to be able to practice within our normal working live

Be smart and manage your time wisely. Time is a critical resource, when it’s gone, it’s gone. Everyone has limited time. We have to utilize it to the maximum benefit. While we are working, concentrate on working, but do so aptly. Don’t work for the future, but forget the present. It’s not smart to neglect mindfulness in the present to dream for the future. We have to be able to practice within our normal working live. We shouldn’t think that we need to go ordain to meditate. People who still think so are like lotuses in the mud, not under water but in the mud.

So, be aware of worldly duties that we may have. We may have the responsibility to take care of our family, parents, children, and spouse. We may have additional responsibilities at our workplace. But if your workplace is immoral, such as running a casino, then you better change. Otherwise, you would be making sins from now till the future. So, choose a clean work and work on it fully. If it’s clean, it won’t impact our meditation practice.

I used to work as a government officer and my main job was arranging meetings. I had to arrange meetings, prepare documents, record minutes, and set the workflow and policies. For example, after we have prepared for a meeting and just waiting for the meeting members to come; Then just watch the breath, breath in noting ‘Bud,’ breath out noting ‘Dho.’ There’s no need to close our eyes. Otherwise, people who don’t meditate may think we’re mad. People are never aware that they’re mad with the world, but they think that people who meditate are mad.

When I meditate, I never do something to attract attention. So, when we meditate among other people, just watch the body and mind with open eyes. Then, when the meeting attendees arrive, if we see a smart person and feel glad, be aware that we’re feeling glad. Another person coming to the meeting may be someone who talks a lot without substance. They may say that in the past, it was like this and that. What we care about is the present, not the past, but they may not care. Then, they keep talking and talking for a long time but no one dares to interrupt.

If we feel bored and annoyed, sometimes even before they speak, then be aware of our mind. This is already meditation practice. While the meeting goes on, we listen to good points and take notes. For some speakers, we just need to listen once in a while, and when we see other people nod, we nod too. Sometimes, we have to pretend to be interested and be polite at the right time. No one knows that we’re meditating while we’re listening to pointless rambles. We just wait for their last sentence and we’ll know what they want to say. We keep meditating, and when we see other people nodding, we nod too. When they smile, we smile too. We keep meditating and accumulating little by little, so both our worldly and dhamma duties progress well and we live a happy life.

Some people asked me how I looked so happy, smiling the whole day despite my busy schedule. I replied that even my work was busy, but I was able to manage it. So, I encourage all of you to try. If your worldly work is not unethical, then work with it fully. But don’t neglect your meditation practice. Time is a limited resource; we must use it wisely.

Luangpu Man used to teach, “Having mindfulness is meditating, no mindfulness is no meditation.” So, we need mindfulness. When we can read the mind, do so. When we can’t, watch the body instead. When our mind is too restless and has no power to watch the mind or the body, do calm meditation. Choose the meditation that is right for us and makes us happy. But there’s a trick. When we practice for calmness, don’t force it to be calm. For the mind to be calm, we must let it rest to have more power. The mind that is working doesn’t get to rest. If it doesn’t get to rest, then it’s not calm meditation.

While the mind is working on worldly jobs or practicing Vipassana, it is stressful enough. If we want to rest but still force the mind to be calm or get angry that it doesn’t get calm, then this is not letting the mind rest. So, when we want calmness, don’t force the mind. If it’s restless, it’s the mind’s business. We just watch the meditation object. Let the mind be. We continue to be mindful of our meditation object. If we don’t force the mind, it will calm down by itself. When we’re proficient, we just think of calmness and we can achieve it because we know how to position the mind.

When we want calmness, just let the mind be, don’t hold it, don’t force it. When we force the mind, it won’t be happy, and when there’s no happiness, there’s no calmness. Happiness is the near cause of concentration, so we need calmness and happiness. Practice with the normal mind. In my case, the breath is my meditation object, so I just watch the breath; whether the mind calms down or not is not my business. When it stays with a single object, the mind doesn’t have to run around searching for new stimuli. Then, we don’t force the mind, so it gets to rest.

When the mind calms down, it gets to rest and gathers more power. It’s like our body that we need to rest and sleep after work. If we don’t rest, then we won’t have energy. Similarly, we must let our mind rest instead of letting it run to the eye, ear, nose, tongue, body and mind to search for external senses. If the mind keeps running around, it is restless and agitated. If we let it stay with a single meditation it can calm down quickly, but don’t force it.

There’s a trick, just use your normal mind to watch a meditation that makes the mind happy. Later, when we become proficient we can be calm whenever we wish. My mind used to get into deep concentration at a bus stop even though there were a lot of people.

Laypeople don’t neglect both worldly matters and dhamma

Let’s practice and we’ll have a resting place. We’ll have more power for both worldly matters and for dhamma. There may be some problems which are very hard and we can’t find solutions. In such cases, don’t continue to think, but let the mind rest. When the mind comes out of concentration, it may have a solution. Sometimes, we can’t think of a good solution, but after a good night’s sleep, we can suddenly realize the solution. So, generally the morning is a good time for working, most people can think more accurately. But we can’t rest and sleep all day. So, whenever we have 5-10 minutes of free time, we can practice calm meditation. After the mind comes out of concentration, we can have more power with both worldly matters and dhamma.

Keep Practicing, we are laypeople, so don’t neglect both worldly matters and dhamma. If we only care for worldly matters, it’s just like all other people. If we only care for dhamma, this is not knowing our responsibilities. Laypeople have several responsibilities. For example, offering food to monks is the responsibility of laypeople. So, we must know the responsibilities and targets in our life. The happiness that most people want will always be in the future. There are always conditions for happiness, such as becoming rich, having a beautiful wife, or having a good kid. But for us Buddhists, we just watch our breath and we can be happy because our mind is not restless. If we want to be above the world, we should not focus on happiness but learn from the suffering of the body and mind.

Yesterday I taught a monk to notice that his mind frequently creates Bhava. Most of us can’t see this because we don’t know the mind that creates Bhava. But this monk is practicing well, so I told him to be aware of it. Once he’s aware of it, his mind lets go of Bhava and becomes free. It is the 8th pair of Citta-satipatthana. Knowing when the mind is liberated or not liberated. It’s not liberated while it stays in the Bhava, but once we are aware of it, it comes free. However, we’re not targeting for the liberated mind. But we need to see that both the liberated and non-liberated mind are still uncertain and non-self. We continue to watch the 3 characteristics, not focusing on liberating the mind. If we focus on liberating the mind, it is another type of concentration and another Bhava. Practicing so is a matter of concentration and it wastes time.

Why is the mind attached to Bhava? It’s because it wants happiness. We can also look at other angles, not only the impermanence aspect. We can see that the mind suffers whenever it stays in a Bhava. But why does it stay in a Bhava? It’s because it thinks it can find happiness. One thing that can trick us is sensual pleasure. People want sensual pleasure because they think it can bring happiness. But once we see that both sensual pleasure and the mind that indulges in it are suffering, the mind relinquishes sensual pleasure. If it sees that Bhava is suffering, it relinquishes Bhava. If it sees that Ditthi (clinging to opinions) brings suffering, it will relinquish Ditthi. All of them are just suffering.

Keep observing. There are several things that the mind indulges in thinking they’re good. But once wisdom can see that sensual pleasure is suffering, it relinquishes sensual pleasure. Precept, concentration, and wisdom all arise within Bhava, so we may believe that Bhava is good. However, we see that no matter how marvelous a Bhava seems to be, it is still suffering. If we can see this, we won’t hold on to Bhava anymore. We can also look at this angle to liberate the mind. We can watch the mind, or we can also look at the surrounding phenomena. They are called inner/outer dhamma, and near/distant dhamma. Distant dhamma doesn’t mean it’s on other planets. It’s still here but distant from the mind. Keep being mindful, and our mind will develop.

It is not difficult to determine who is an Arahant. Just check if their mind is still attached to Bhava. It’s easy to see, but first, we need to see the mind that is attached to Bhava. Just look at the defilements. See if they still have Asava and Upadana. Each defilement has its specific style of action. For example, the style of hindrances is to block, blocking wholesomeness. Asava slowly seeps in, Upadana jumps out to catch something. Each defilement has its own style. We continue to practice so we won’t be fooled by them.

The way is to see suffering. As we see that all Bhava is suffering, the mind is liberated from Bhava. As we see that all minds are suffering, the mind is relinquished. Bhava is known and the mind is the knower. As we let go of the mind, there’s no more Bhava. As we see that Bhava is suffering, it lets go and the mind has no more Bhava. Just listen for now and uphold the 5 precepts first.

I’m telling us all this because there are not many remaining masters now. And the remaining masters don’t teach such knowledge anymore since people could criticize them. I’m not afraid of people criticizing me. I say I listened from previous masters. I don’t know much, if you want to argue, just go argue with the masters.

Make the best of your present life. Don’t dream of the future and forget the present.